You… OFF MY PLANET!

seeing that california followed the footsteps of mass and approved of gay marriage. for those conservatives saying that the world will come to an end…i’m still waiting.

i still can’t understand why they are preventing us from being as miserable as the rest of the heterosexual community. think about it…how miserable a lot of married people are…why wouldn’t you want to share that misery? so, i’ve been part of the community that’s apparently been exempt from feeling the misery of married bliss?

that’s just stupid…

so in defiance to all those people who says i can’t do something…alexis and i were married in a civil ceremony in san francisco on 6/20. shach was the witness on record, along with maneesh…as a wedding present, they also got us a night at the ritz. it was incredible, and absolutely amazing. we spent the rest of the time in cali hanging out, and visiting with friends and just generally be at peace. it wasn’t a planned event, not in my conventional way. we did it almost as a spur of a moment thing…but it was something we had always spoken about…to have a ceremony (how ever simple) - and pledge ourselves to each other. so talk about being at the right place, at the right time.

it honestly was the most pleasant experience we’ve ever had in a city agency. everyone was pleasant, happy, and beyond helpful. we were in and out of cityhall within an hour…nerve wrecking yes…difficult no.

so, we’re married…yay!!

okay, that’s all for now…

~ciao

Dust to dust and ashes to ashes
Rain from the heavens, tears from the gods
A soul taken, those remaining go forth
Searching for the meaning, for the cause, for the consequence
Notes from an angel lifted to the unknown
As we bid farewell to him
A soldier, a son, a brother, a husband, an uncle, a father
We continue the search
We challenge the convention
We hold that is precious to us dear
Sadness and tears transformed
And we mourn and celebrate the life
Raising a glass to him
We imagine him smiling
Down on us all…and wait for the day we join him.

~ciao

the age of the internet. i happened on a blog…of a child i once knew, of a young adult that’s struggling for identity, of a woman who is trying to find her place or perhaps just recognition.

it’s quick study on someone. how they think, even without telling you. how someone goes through maturity and emerge from the other side older, and perhaps wiser…learning from mistakes, treading in waters that we have all traversed, in the vast ocean of experiences and realizing what she must become.

reading, i realized these were the thoughts i had at that age, the anger, the confusion…the helplessness, and realizing for the first time the fragility of who and what i was.

more…later perhaps

~ciao

hindsight is always 20/20 right? if i knew then what i know now…blah blah blah. over the weekend an opportunity was offered to me for…greener pastures. greener being the key word…more of the greens. so the decisions came down to be…more $$…or knowing that i have the respect and affection of my coworkers and company as a whole.

we discussed it…eventually chose to leave it be and stay put. hoping that was the right choice…

here’s to hoping i wo’nt regret it 6 months down the road…

~ciao

sometimes i peruse the world of the blog, and see what others in the world are up to. some blogs i surf are from people i know…others are strangers to me. i read them the same way, judging each entry without consideraiton of who the author is. i suppose for anyone reading my journal, it’s the same. there is one livejournal that i read, of this woman, her girlfriend, and their lives in the greater ATL region. currently, the gf has chosen to take a full time permanent position in the northeast, and she’s not liking the prospect of moving out of the comforts of the south…into the bustling city life. there’s also the cost of living…in the ATL area…the dollar goes a bit further. in the northeast, 2k for rent isn’t really something to harping about…however, the author of this particular blog gasped at the price of the rent, and wondered why she was giving up the comforts of a $1200 rent for a house, not an apt, and a yard.

i guess it’s just one of those things huh?

i never understood why people have a problem grasping that things cost differently in different parts of the country. there’s a price to be paid to live closer to the one you love…and to civilization?

~ciao

i’ve abstained from writing about the democratic race for so long - always holding out that glimmer of hope the country would be able to see past the grandeur of speeches and see the candidates for who they are. but it seems that i have aimed to high for most folks in this country. regardless what happens at the end, the democrats will have made history, to put out either a black man, or a woman as their representative vying for that opportunity to be the commander in chief.

having said that…i can’t say that i’m satisfied with the race thus far. i see obama, and i look at hillary. neither is perfect, far from it in fact. but it seems that the country has turned a blind eye to obama, instead choosing to believe in his glam speeches whereby he fluffs the country up…never quite saying anything. what has he offered to do with the country once he gets into that position? from everything i’ve heard from him, i would expect as soon as he took the oath to the office, the cloud would part and all of a sudden everything would be better - the war would suddenly be over, the real estate market would rebound, and happy days are here again… is that really realistic? i watch him speak, and admittedly, he is an incredible orator…he is passionate about what he says, so passionate in fact you believe him purely because he’s speaking it. i’ve heard him compared to some of the greatest orators…MLK jr. being the most compared to…and that’s great. i feel pumped too when i listen to him…the can do attitude, the changes that are going to happen…but what i ask myself (and i’m not sure whether other people do) is how. how will you bring about this change? MLK jr. brought about change with what he said, how he inspired…obama inspires in similar fashion…but how long will it take for the obama changes come about? dr. king’s movement took years, decades in fact and to this day a lot of his principles are still being tested. i know as well as anyone that changes will eventually happen but when? he only has four years. four years to erase the bush mistakes, figure out what to do, how to do it, and actually apply it all to a country that has been under attack and on a downward spiral for 8 years. when obama gets presented to the world, what is he going to do? talk the other leaders to death? they’re not wearing rose color glasses…north korea do not care that this is the first black american president…they care whether stuff will get done…not what obama is saying…

hillary clinton…what can you say about her. she’s a bitch. and you know what…while that may be true, she’ll make sure that stuff gets done. she has the practical knowledge to get it done. she’s not perfect…but there’s action behind her words. she has a plan to pull the troops out, and not just with pretty words. she may not win you over with the passion in her speeches, but what she says…it’s practical. there’s a possibility that something can happen before her four years are up. yes, she voted for the war…what every critic is forgetting is 7 years ago, everyone wanted retaliation for the atrocity done to america as a whole. everyone wanted to go out and get those guys that caused us pain…and so did she. what was obama thinking? that he was going to go and talk bin laden to death? or perhaps talk him out of his caves? talk is just that…talk. what about doing? talking is great, but it’s not usually an effective plan unless following the talking is some action… am i saying that she’ll be the best candidiate? probably not. politics is a dirty game…and it’s always just a matter of choosing the lesser of the evils presented.

who’s going to pick the country up from the ruins? who’s going to restore our reputation to the world? the one who makes pretty speeches but who’s never been under the gun? or the one who’s been there already, been at the dance, and mingled with the prom committee? someone i know brought up a good point…elect her, we get two for the price of one. lol…i suppose that’s one way of looking at it…

~ciao

roughly 3 months of 4 days a week of martial arts…kick this, hit that, straighten out your leg, block the hit, 45 degree angle with the foot…chamber…chamber…CHAMBER!!! i think i’ve found muscles i never knew i had, bruises in places i didn’t think i could be bruised, and more exhausted 4 days a week than i previously thought was possible.

the trade off…3 months ago, i could barely get a bag of the boys food up the stairs. the bag of food was the standard 30 pounds…coming out of beowoof the other day, i slung the bag over my shoulder, much to the surprise of carl (the proprietor of the store) - and walked out with ease. i didn’t even think about it until alexis asked whether i needed help. i suppose that meant that my workouts are reaping me results. while i’m not seeing the weight loss i really want, i suppose building muscles and knowing how to defend myself is a perk as well?

never thought i’d enjoy it…but i do…and it’s enjoyment on such a strange level. the thought of going there pains me…knowing that i’m going to push my body to new limits, and the pain it will cause kills me…but once i’m there, i have a great time. i learn the moves, the kicks, the punches, the way you move out of the way when someone comes at you…and the way you fight back once you’ve intercepted the hit.

maybe i’ve found my outlet…i seem to be pretty okay at it..let’s see what happens right?

~ciao

steph