You… OFF MY PLANET!

i saw a woman today as i boarded my train on my daily commute home. her bag caught my eye at first, she had the bag to a nice japanese china store that i frequent…then it was her face…the wrinkles that criscross her face doesn’t hide that she once was a classic japanese beauty. her movements fluid, no signs of aging…her small stature most likely disguising the strength that lie within her…i walked behind her, watching her, fascinated by her every move. she stared into space, perhaps like the rest of us, just reading the random ads posted in the cars to pass time until her stop…i saw in her my own grandmother, how similar they seemed…from the same era, strong women who had to survive while the men were off to die in a war the world blindly fought against each other. i wondered where she had been, perhaps coming from the same city as my grandmother’s family…what horrors has she seen…what joys has she celebrated…

perhaps she led an ordinary life, much like my grandmother…married, loving husband, children, and grandchildren surrounding her. relying on others as much as they relied on her…

she looked up at me, and i saw a pair of kind eyes, looking at me as if i was one of her own. my smile mirrored her own as we exited the train at the same stop. i walked behind her, almost in a protective stance, shielding her in the short span up the escalator…i dont’ know what i was protecting her from, or why i was doing it, only that i felt the need to, to make sure she was okay while she was in my presence.

as we stepped off the escalator, i watched as she walked away slowly, in the opposite direction that i was headed. i fought an urge to follow her, to help her with her bag as i would have if she was my grandmother…instead, i walked on, head hung low as i thought of my own, wondering whether she was thinking of me as i was of her…and i smiled…know the answer was yes…

i will call my grandmother tomorrow…just to say hi…and to let her know i am thinking of her…although she will never know how much or how deeply i miss her…i’m sure it’s still nice to just know you’re being missed…

steph

2 years ago today…a rain of fire and ashes came down on me as my friend and i frantically walked midtown to find a way out of manhattan.

2 years ago today, i stood in time square…taking a moment to marvel at the fact there were no cars, no buses, no vehicles of any sort…only pedestrians…each running from something they feared and yet was uncertain about…

2 years ago today i looked up the eerily empty streets of the busiest city in the united states and wondered…why.

2 years ago today, i looked down 5th avenue, along with thousands of other people, all stopped and watched as 2 mighty buildings burned and crashed into oblivion.

2 years ago today, i travelled safely out of manhattan and headed straight for a blood bank to give what i can…little did i know then there would be very little need for that help…

2 years ago today, i mourned the death of all those who perished in the flames, sympathized with those who were left behind…and yet, i felt no anger but that towards our own leader for the stupidity of his actions and his words in the days that followed the tragedy.

2 years ago today i thanked all deities that i was still alive and enjoying this earth while so many others were gone in an instant…

2 years ago today, i witnessed an even that will forever be etched in my mind…

2 years ago today, i will never forget.

well ladies and gentlemen, it was a sad day on the planet today. the planet mascot, mr. turtle, opted for freedom from the humdrum of daily routine by escaping to the wild this afternoon. he apparently devised a plan, and executed it to perfection as he is no longer anywhere to be found.

he has been my companion for 2 and some years, and i’ve seen him grow from a tiny creature to being approximately the size of my palm. in the two years he’s kept me company, he’s seen some turbulance in my life parallel to none. he’s held in there with me, weathering through my absent minded-ness of not feeding him for a day or two, and my constant babble about life, love, and my pursuit of happiness. there were days i swear he understood me as he sat there and patiently watched me speak. most recently, he had grown to waking me when he’s hungry to ensure i do not forget about him again. i was in the process of making that transition for him from my old home to the new one…however, since the weather has been cooperating, and there is a large (at least to him) pond outside the old home, i opted to leave him for a while longer…this plan has proven to be my miscalculation.

i enjoyed my time with him…and i wish him well…i am very sad to see him go off in his chosen path, but i suppose that is a decision that each of us has to make for ourselves. he’s an intelligent creature who will no doubt survive…and i’ve tried sending my thoughts out to him so he would know where home is…always. the tears i shed today were for the loss of future memories…and for the times we’ve had together…

he will be missed greatly, as i wish for his return…but i wish him luck in the world he’s chosen to explore…

steph

well, today technically i had off…however i still woke up and went to work to just finish some stuff…well, lo and behold, i walked into the office and realized that there’s this slow leak from the ceiling and probably been there since friday…so my office furniture is warped, i’ve got water on the floor, and everything on my desk is ruined…so, i’m convinced that the pipes and i are now sworn enemies…

anyway, saturday night, alexis’s mom, grandma, and brother came over for dinner…i was a nervous wreck (though i will never admit it) and apparently it was a success…grandma and mom seemed to like dinner enough…so i’m all good in their book. low-fat dinner and yummy fresh fruit dessert…i’m a hit…*grin*

nothing much else is happening…waiting for alexis to come home from getting her learn-on…another semester and i’ll always have somethign waiting for her when she gets home for a nice home-cooked dinner…

aren’t i a nice girlfriend?

steph