You… OFF MY PLANET!

a dichotomy of hearts
a trichotomy of spirits
a soul torn
a heart broken
a dream on the brink
a bubble burst
a woman lost

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no explanation really…just came to me…maybe because of the movie?

slave labor huh? well, the offer is enticing, but PH - i’m more interested in the made from scratch pasta sauce you keep telling me about…cause you know…me being not italian, i like the jar stuff…

so, i saw an incredible movie last night…a peck on the cheek - i think it’s actually a sri lankan film by an indian director? something like that…but went to see it with my international media class…definitely a good movie…i’d recommend everyone to watch…but i dont’ think it’ll be distributed widely…no foreign film really is ya know?

what else…well, i’m stalling on the 4 papers and a final i have in the next week…hopefully i’ll get it all done…anyway…that’s all for now…

okay…so i’m marching to the beat of a different drummer…hee hee…always wondered what that meant…anyway…been listening to the soundtrack to varekai - it’s very very interesting. the music is very powerful and the passion apparent in every note and every beat. okay, so i actually saw the show also…and this just brings me back to the show too. but nonetheless, the music is still amazing. so for those of you who care, that’s what i was listening to…track 2 - Le Reveur - anyway…good song, good music if you ever just want to get lost in music…

what else is going on…well, ooh!! i talked to my best friend today, and she’s finally fuckin coming home. after an 8 months vaca, she’s dragging her ass home, with gifts for me. everything else is going well i suppose…sometimes i get noises in my head…but they’re calm-able. i think most of the noise stem from finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel…i’m anticipating closing to be the week of the 7th…talk about happy birthday to me! so, you figure after everything is said and done…i’ll be moved in by mid-july…finally…my own place. i’ll need help fixing up the place…mainly to paint the place…take out the stupid wall paper…but overall…within 3 weeks, i’ll have my own apt. god that feels good.

that’s it for now…i’m sure i’ll edit later…i have class tonight…which means i’ll be bored and in a writing mood…

steph

Acrid taste in my mouth
A bitter pill to swallow
The rush of a speeding car
The adrenaline coursing through the blood
Salt of tears track down a battered visage
Pain
Physical
Emotional
Screams silenced
Thudding beat of music
Thunder through the core
Shaking the foundations life was built on
Drowning in the voices of the song
I surrendered my consciousness.
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all of this done while speeding through traffic at 90mph…i mean…who needs to think while weaving through traffic?!

steph

point of clarification…for those who actually read this and know me, you know that i write. hence, when i want to write, when my muse decides that it’s a good day, i.e. feng-shui is kickin’, sun’s shining, stars are aligning with their correct planets…I WRITE!!!

no particular subject intended at, perhaps just a dream girl, or girls…or maybe i have a girl(s) in mind that it’s intended at…i mean, have you seen j.lo? seriously though…everyone relax. what i do in my personal life, is not so much for public consumption. if/when i choose to tell you who i am interested in, i will do so on my terms, at my convenience…not yours.

so everyone, just remember, steph’s allowed to have an imagination…she’s allowed to write to fictional or nonfictional people, and moreover, she’s allowed to keep her private life…well…PRIVATE!!

****end of rant****

**edited to add**

if you have problems with the above…comment for god sake…don’t call me and ask me whether it’s directed at you…you know if it is.

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steph

into my dreams you walk
your eyes with the mischievous gleam i love so much
into my life you strolled
your smile with the upwards turn of your lips i can’t resist
into my soul you took residence
your heart met mine and i surrendered.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

been in the mood to write sappy shit lately…it’s not even good i know…but just random stuff wanting to spew out…maybe i’m just being horomonal…

steph

so i took and extended weekend in the catskills…well, rather than typing the whole damn thing over again…i took the post i did from a board i belonged to and copied/pasted here…
disclaimer: i’m a huge buffy fan…hence that’s where i was, with katy and lex, at a buffy convention where i met amber benson, Anthony Stewart Head (ASH), James Marsters, and James Leary. all of which are charcters from buffy…so without further delay…here’s the post…
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god i waited all weekend to vent about this…let’s take this one aspect at a time…

Lodgings… - well, we had lodgings. i suppose that’s the upside of things. let’s talk about the rooms and the luxurious friar tuck resort…the room was…*ahem* well, barren was the word that came to mind. bed, dresser, table, tv. i think they have more furniture in a 2×2 jail cell. the bathroom was either built for the geriatric ward or gymnast wanna-be’s. alexis stubbed her toes repeatedly on the damn bars that were wobbly and would kill someone if they ever leaned their weight on it…i must have slammed my hands onto the damn bar a million times trying to get to the tp. okay…our view was of the lovely concrete courts that once was a racquet ball court…to get the the ill-maintained tennis courts, you must traverse a mud puddle the size of manhattan (i suppose this is where the paddle boats would come in handy - they were in the geese shit infested pond) - you think they would be getting ready for the summer season…

the food - riiigh…let’s talk about the food. remember when you were in college, and you walked into the dining hall…looked at the food…and cringed inwardly? that was the same reaction i had. i went to rutgers university in nj…and i thought the food there was horrible…christ, the food at the friar tuck made my dining hall experience look like the four season! i had carbs, carbs, more carbs, with a side of carbs, and a carb sauce…wait…oooh, a variety…fried carbs!! so, here we were, sitting next to the buffet tables, when i realized that there were more flies around the food than people…*ponders this internally* that would explain the tummy ache i got…*shakes head*

the event - hmm…let’s see if i can describe the scene that prevailed for most of the weekend… think of the word bedlam and all tha entails. think of every horror movie where there’s a monster attacking a large crowd of people and the mayhem that ensued. got that picture? good…now multiply that by 100, and maybe you’ll get an idea of the complete chaos that was at MR. the premise was great…intimate setting…well, it would’ve been if lovely julie caitlin brown wasn’t down everyone throat about breathing in JM’s persence, the security staff screaming after every guest…i actually saw 3 guys chase after ASH while he tried to talke to JM screaming “HEY…YOU CAN’T DO THAT…GET BACK HERE!!” - i failed to see that these guys are 3 year olds who can’t take care of themselves. okay…and let’s not forget the lines…”ALL OF YOU!!! GET INTO LINES BY YOUR BADGE NUMBER!!!…NO WAIT…YOU CAN SIT WITH YOUR FRIENDS…NO WAIT…BY YOUR BADGE NUMBERS!!…NO…FINE, YOU CAN SIT WITH YOUR FRIENDS!!” how about…MAKE UP YOUR FREAKIN’ MINDS!!! - between the confused MR staff, random security staff running around, and julie catlin brown pushing herself into everyone’s personal space and screaming…there was fun to be had by all!

overall - well, if i was a horse, i think i would’ve weathered the flies better (note the swooshing tail to keep pests away) - since i’m from the city, i have an iron stomach…the food didn’t bother me too much *hides the embarassing gurgle of bowels attempting to move* - and the geriatric bathroom with wobbly bars? hey, who really need a functioning toe or an unbruised hand? or for that matter, who really needs tp when you decide to use the facilities?

the few saving graces of this little escapade into the mountains were the company i kept…and joe the bartender at the hotel bar…so thank you joe (even though he won’t read this) and thanks to the mods and everyone else i hung around with…definitely cool to have met you all…

~steph
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needless to say, it was an experience that i rather not repeat. seriously, the place looked like the set of some cheezy b-rated horror movie and i was expecting the swamp thing to emerge from the lovely…ummm…pond thing they had in the middle of the compound. the con cost way too much, and we got way too little for our money…since it was my first one (and a first for katy and alexis as well), the sentiment i think is to never return to another fan-run convention. interestingly enough though, i think i’ve been converted to being an amber benson fan. never liked her much before, always thought she had one expression - but after listening to her at the q&a session and just randomly running into her in the halls and on the compound, she’s proven herself to be a very nice, sweet, candid, and overall friendly person…so i suppose that was a good thing?

steph